Who Made Me?

 Many years ago I attended a special sports meet for deaf mute children. I heard a five year old ask his mother why these children could not speak. She replied, ‘because they are very bad persons and God wants to punish them.’ I was startled to hear these heartless words come from an educated woman. I quite worried about the effect on her child’s mind and attitude to life.

Why are some of us born disabled? Is it Karma? Where do the physically challenged fit in God’s plan? The pain of disability is not confined only to the disabled, but is shared by the mother who faces the guilt of giving birth to such a child.

The most enlightening quote on this subject is  from a friend. She had parked her son’s wheelchair outside a shop. An old and wizened man dressed in saffron, squatted beside him and stared long and hard at the child. There was a twinkle in his eyes. My friend joked, “So, was my son complaining about me?” He replied, “This child is a highly evolved soul. God in his infinite kindness has made him incapable of committing sins in this birth. Even a small regressive step will result in his sliding down the spiritual ladder.”

Then there is the heartbreaking story of a young disabled woman who went to offer prayers at a renowned temple in Kerala. Sheelu is totally wheelchair bound and suffers from a disability which can be painful and needs special handling. Ironically, this bright young lady was in that city to attend a seminar about inclusion of the disabled into normal society. The temple authorities refused to allow her wheelchair in the premises. She must use only their ‘holy’ wheelchair, they said, and she had to leave her own at the entrance. When she and a group of five women wished to enter the sanctum sanctorum, again permission to go inside on a wheel-chair was refused. Inspite of her protests, Sheelu’s friends insisted that they will carry her inside as she had come all the way for darshan. The other devotees crowded around, pushing and hustling them. Exhausted and unsuccessful in going anywhere near the idol, they placed her carefully on steps nearby   while trying to convince the temple authorities who loudly argued and berated them for creating so much trouble for everybody. The other devotees were dumb spectators. The friends could not find the wheelchair as the exit had led them to another corner of the temple. So again Sheelu was carried in a circuitous route to the main entrance. The final cruel blow was when the watchman at the entrance, seeing this group return, sadistically pushed the wheelchair further away! A traumatic, humiliating and embarrassing experience such as this would have left anybody else depressed and wallowing in self pity. But not Sheelu. She bounced back into her routine although this had actually been a matter of life and death for her.

. All religions preach compassion and love towards all living beings. Today more and more people are turning to religion and spirituality as global violence is on the rise. Then why are meaningless wars being waged leaving behind innocent children with amputated limbs? When devotees throng holy places and stand for hours in long queues for a half-minute darshan, what exactly is on their mind? It makes one wonder. Have we become so selfish, heartless and cruel that we cannot feel compassion towards the less fortunate? 

Disabled persons accept God-given challenges cheerfully but are frustrated and defeated when ‘able human beings’ like the temple authorities in Kerala behave in an uncivilized manner.   Today we hear about disabled achievers, for whom conquering the Mt.Everest is not unattainable. Some like Sheelu, become activists for their cause. There are so many success stories of their capability and successful lives that they can put the best of us to shame.

Enlightened parents acknowledge that a handicapped child attains the place of a spiritual guru in their lives. In caring for them, they learn patience, discipline, acceptance and the intense faith that our scriptures preach. 

By nature disabled persons are fiercely independent and dislike overt expressions of pity and sympathy from others. They yearn to be included in the mainstream and to enjoy the same privileges as everyone. Each time one of us feel like complaining about petty shortcomings in our life, we should halt for a moment and remember these wonderfully brave people whom we see in our daily life. Instead we ogle shamelessly when we see a spastic child wriggle in the parent’s arms or in a wheelchair. Relatives and friends refuse to entertain them at home. Sometimes parents are politely told not to bring ’it’ to happy occasions like weddings. Children jeer at their mannerisms. Neighbours and bystanders in a public places offer free advice and ask humiliating questions. 

There is no answer to the question why God, who created man in his own image, also created disability. No, wait… there is an answer. A dear friend of mine told me a story that sends a thrill down my spine every time I recount it. She was wheeling her small spastic son in a pram at the local park. An old sadhu dressed in saffron robes stopped by and peered into the pram. She ignored his presence for some time but he locked eyes with the child and seemed to be having a conversation with him. Afraid he was doing black magic or some such thing the mother tried to move away. The old man gave a benign smile and said,” I was having a discussion with this child who is in reality an enlightened rishi. This is his last cycle of birth and after his death in this lifetime, and he will attain moksha. To protect him, God has made your son child-like and incapable of committing any evil in this birth.”